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Album: Miscellaneous (1988)
Artists: Sherman Allan

  1. Al N Yetta
  2. Americas A Nice Italian Name
  3. Automation
  4. Barry Is The Babys Name
  5. Beautiful Teamsters
  6. Bye Bye Blumberg
  7. Eight Foot Two Solid Blue
  8. Good Advice
  9. Green Stamps
  10. Grow Mrs Goldfarb Grow
  11. Hail To Thee Fat Person
  12. Harvey And Sheila
  13. Headaches
  14. Hello Muddah Hello Fadduh
  15. Heres To The Crabgrass
  16. Holiday For States
  17. Hungarian Goulash No 5
  18. I Cant Dance
  19. I See Bones
  20. J C Cohen
  21. Kiss Of Myer
  22. Little Butterball
  23. Lotsa Luck
  24. Me
  25. Mexican Hat Dance
  26. No Ones Perfect
  27. One Hippopotami
  28. Pills
  29. Pop Hates The Beatles
  30. Rat Fink
  31. Ride Of Paul Revere
  32. Shine On Harvey Bloom
  33. Shticks Of One Kind And Half A Dozen Of The Other
  34. Skin
  35. The Bronx Bird Watcher
  36. The Dropouts March
  37. The Lion's Share


Sherman Allan
Miscellaneous
Grow Mrs Goldfarb Grow
+Grow, Mrs. Goldfarb, Grow

Grow, Mrs. Goldfarb, fatter, fatter.
Pile the potatoes on your platter.
Listen to me, 'cause I'm your hubby.
I just adore you plump and chubby.
I got a letter from the state, Dear.
You're gonna need a license plate, Dear.
My little elephant joke come true.
Chew, Mrs. Goldfarb, chew!

There is so much more of you,
More to adore of you,
'Cause you're not slender.
In your white dress, you're a doll,
Big as the Taj Mahal,
In all its splendor.
When you're in department stores,
Don't use revolving doors,
You might get stuck, Dear.
When you use the telephone,
Go in the booth alone,
And lots of luck, Dear.

You had for breakfast: two pounds bacon,
Three dozen eggs, one coffee cake, and
Then you had something really awful,
Four kippered herrings on a waffle.
Nine English muffins, one baked apple,
Boston cream pie, Philadelphia scrapple.
Seventeen bowls of Crispy Crunch.
Then you said, "What's for lunch?"

Sweetheart, you are giant size.
You are Lane Bryant size,
My darling Myrtle.
Last Thanksgiving I was thrilled.
You ate so much, you killed
Your living girdle.
Have another dozen shrimp,
My lovely little blimp.
Don't count a calorie.
I have just received a stub.
I owe the Diner's Club
A whole year's salary.

Eat, Mrs. Goldfarb, daily, nightly.
Eat, though your chair is bending slightly.
Love of my life, I'm glad I found you,
Each day I take a walk around you.
I can't forget when we got married.
Over the threshhold I got carried.
No other bride would be so sweet.
Eat, Mrs. Goldfarb, Eat!
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